London Calling!

So, back in December 2012, I got on an airplane and flew to London and stayed a week.  We were going essentially to celebrate Alyssa's graduation from college, but we also celebrated our birthdays, Christmas and mine and David's anniversary while we were there (for the record, my birthday is around Thanksgiving and the girls are right after the new year...and everything else is sandwiched in between).

What an awesome trip that was.  Here's a picture to prove that we went and loved each other and had a good time.

It was cold when we went and dark.  We were there during the Winter Solstice that year and sunset was right about 4pm.  While I've experienced colder, and damper, we didn't spend lots of time doing things outside.

Oh, and I was 90 pounds heavier and David was 140 pounds heavier.  I haven't been on a plane since that trip and David assures me it's going to be a shocker.  I'm SO excited to be shocked...Because you know what?

IN TWO DAYS I'M LEAVING AGAIN FOR LONDON!!!!!

This time we are celebrating 25 years since David and I decided to be a couple "forever and ever" (on July 4, 1989).

And you know what?  I'm so very very tired right now I'm having the hardest time getting myself geared up and excited about this trip.  I've made an itinerary (which I never do) to see if we can work in most of the things we want to do...I've been checking the weather every day (60s and sunny predicted for our first 5 days there!)...

...but mostly I've just been getting through the day I'm in (and to demonstrate just how much I'm just getting through the day I'm in, I haven't even THOUGHT ABOUT the knitting/crochet I'm taking on this trip.  NOT EVEN THOUGHT ABOUT IT!....And I'm having trouble mustering up the usual panic that that would elicit...)

I'm so ready to get on the plane, go on vacation, and leave this job and my other worries and cares behind and simply enjoy being in the company of the man that 25 years ago I was impressed enough with to want to spend the rest of my life with him...

And...this year we're going to be there over the Summer Solstice...sunset around 9:45pm...

What an awesome way to usher in the new life I'm setting up for myself.  I'm staying an extra 5 days than originally intended. David will be working with his students (research project for graduate students in his department) and I will be going to see and do something textile-y type things that I know he isn't much interested in.

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Daddy's Story:  Once when we were talking with my daddy about a vacation we wanted to go on, he said, "I don't know why you want to travel so much.  Aren't you happy with where you live?"  And when I told him I was, he said, "I just don't see any point in leaving home if you like it there."

That he was a homebody and only went on a couple of vacations in my memory of him shows me that he was indeed a very happy man with where he lived.

Y'all...I'm singing...

I can tell I'm getting happier and less stressed by the day.  Today on the way to work, I cranked up the radio and sang loud...at one point I stopped and said, "when was the last time you did that?"

And I don't know.

Clearly things here had gotten to me deeper than I realized.  Just as I wrote about yesterday, it's the little things that make you realize just where you are and what you're doing...that whole gaining perspective thing that's so difficult when you're bogged down in the middle and don't know where the end is anymore.

Things for me had gotten to the point that I didn't have enough time between work days to destress and put it aside and enjoy myself.

I didn't sing. or play piano.  or laugh nearly enough.

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One of the things I'm definitely looking forward to about my working from home will be this...sweet kitty time!

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Daddy's story:  As I mentioned he really loved the weather and would pay attention and store away weather conditions for people wherever they lived.  He'd look up the weather in Austin, Houston, and even where I lived.  If you went on vacation, he'd hunt up weather information on your vacation destination as well.  How I would love to tell him that the past few weeks in London has been in the mid-70s for highs and sunny...he'd be so jealous he might even consider getting on the plane with us...but nah...he wouldn't do that.

It's the little things

People always say it's the little things that count, and I find that to be a fascinating concept...especially to someone who crafts.  It is the little things we do that add up--one stitch at a time, one little speck of yarn or strip of fabric, one minute we spend adds up to many minutes...and all those little things become glorious works of art that we can either enjoy or look at.

In a building sense, little things become big things.  Bricks for instance, look tiny next to a 2 story house, but that house is built out of bricks.

Life, too, is built up of little things.  Moments we share with people we love.  Imprinted memories we have.  Those special connections we make that sometimes seem incomprehensible...sometimes we don't even know that it's going to be the "thing" that sticks out for us.

In my mind's eye right now I'm trying to look at the positive things about my work and my choice to be brave and do the artist thing (that's what everyone is telling me, that I'm being brave...and considering how terrified I am, I'm getting it...being brave is really scary stuff!)...

BUT...

...and this is where it gets tricky because I don't want to be negative on my blog ever, but man...there have been a lot of little things here that have piled up to make me into one miserable person.  It was a major component of my decision to do the artist thing...(though really I don't think I had much choice in the matter...it was becoming increasingly evident to me what my path was: I just had to step on it).

I'm finding when I go home at night this week that I'm more excited about things that I've always been excited about until recently.  I want to read books. I want to play with the cats.  I want to stay up all night and create and play.  I'm cracking jokes, being silly, and encouraging people around me to play.  I even had a full conversation with myself yesterday morning.

I'm such a huge believer in play and how it helps us be more creative and energetic.  I totally think we need recess at work and exercises or games or something fun to do to distract our minds from the toil that it gets into.

...and I've been in the wrong environment.  Play is not appreciated nor respected in my office and I have become more and more unhappy as I've had to shut out that instinct in me to ENJOY myself in the things that I do--and to relax with a little silliness before getting back to the seriousness.

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In discussing all my professional life with David recently he's said over and over again that I'm really just not the personality that fits in well with an office environment where I'm expected to do the same thing everyday.

And I get it and I can't wait until I get into my studio environment and can play.

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I'm going to color by the way.  Make pictures with pencils and markers.  I'm excited.

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I started to crochet a shawl from lace weight yarn.  I thought it would be nice to take to London next week.  It might--it's tiny and will hardly take any room in the suitcase--but it's definitely NOT something to do on the plan, so now I have to figure that out.  I'm thinking it'll probably be socks, but we shall see.

Here is the shawl...it's pretty...and it took me a few tries to get it right, but now it's easy peasy.  But I do want to say that doing 386 single crochet foundation chains is time consuming...

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Daddy's story:  Everyday when my dad got home from work he would go out and feed the cows.  I got to go with him when I was younger and it was always fun throwing the hay around for the cows to eat.  He would let me ride in the trailer sometimes and I think he hit every hole in the ground on purpose to hear me holler...he liked hearing us holler!

I'm Hooked

(haha, get the pun? it's bad I know, but it's there anyway!)

I am crocheting a basket!  Who knew you could crochet baskets?  I love baskets, and I love crochet and now I can combine the two.

Actually this is my first non-square project and I am having a great time.  In fact, I didn't want to go to sleep last night because I was just figuring out that trellis stitch pattern that you see on the side there.  FUN!

I'm going to give it to my mama to use to bring in her veggies from the garden.

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Daddy's story:   When he brushed his teeth every night he would walk around the house with his toothbrush in his mouth for what seemed like forever.  I always thought it was so very very funny.

And interestingly, he had pretty good teeth...

Eye Candy

All the "interesting" work is done on this sock...now it's just plain ribbing until the toe and then the toe and then finish it off.  I love it.  I love the fit, the yarn and the pattern.  I'd love to have a completed pair by the end of this weekend.

Busy day at work today, so I thought I'd just share this really quickly...still crocheting and needlepointing...still totally unfocused, but such is my life right now.

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Daddy's story:  Daddy loved keeping up with the weather.  In fact, he had little tablets that he kept next to his chair and wrote the high and low temps and the sunrise and sunset for each day.  When he was out of town he would have to "catch up."

How he would have loved computers if he hadn't been scared of them.

Genius

As I was about to start typing this post about the genius of Cookie A's sock designs, I got a text from my mom about my uncle who is in ICU ...and then as I was texting David  (who is in NC this week) to let him know I saw on Facebook that Maya Angelou just passed away.

And really, it's all related through the concept of genius.  My uncle is a genius who worked for NASA and could build computers before computers were something people had at home and taught himself to play violin after he retired.  He's young in the grand scheme of things, so I hope they can stabilize him and get him healthy to come home and have a good life.  When I stayed with him and my aunt the week I learned to weave, he stored up a good number of weaving puns to scatter on me each day as I went to my lessons.

Maya Angelou...what can one say about the beauty, complexity, and phenomenon of that woman.  I took my daughters to see her speak when they were only 9 years old despite the fact that they decidedly did NOT want to go and I think we got the last 4 tickets to the show because we were in the very back row and in the middle seats.  "Phenomenal Woman" (which I linked above) and "Still I Rise" were two of the most powerful experiences of my life.  She also had this refrain during her performance of "the walls of Jericho came tumbling down."  It was chill-inducing (though I honestly can't remember what it was connected to other than a breaking down of social barriers, which is important enough in and of itself).  Despite being in the very back middle seats, I was mesmerized (and so were my little girls) and felt like Dr. Angelou was speaking right to me. (In fact, I think Elizabeth said something to that very effect when we left)  I have cherished every piece of writing of hers that I've run my eyes across and will miss the potential of new work to come.  I will also miss the regular updates she posted on Facebook...she had a way of cutting to the core of things and exposing the heart (and sometimes cutting that up a little too) to make us THINK about our actions, thoughts, words and ways of living.  She is indeed an American Treasure, and my little memory of her is but a speck of sand on the seashore to her talent and amazing abilities.  She will be hugely missed.

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Cookie A...Cookie A is a genius of the sock design kind.  I have not met a pattern by her that did not (almost instantly) captivate me and make me want to finish it.  I even like doing stitches that I don't typically like doing if she wrote the pattern...this is something I'm having trouble understanding.  I really find 1x1 ribbing tedious unless I'm working on a Cookie A pattern and then it's amazing.  Go figure.

As I was working on my Drogon sock (pic below) I was fascinated by this very thing.  1x1 ribbing with a twisted knit stitch in a pattern that I was really struggling to understand.  There was this reverse yarn over thing that was NOT turning out right and looked strange on my needles and I couldn't seem to manage the pattern repeat and was having to look at the chart every three or four stitches.

Then...it dawned on me how much of a genius Cookie A is.  As I was working on the difficult part and said, "what's happening here and why am I having trouble with it?" I realized that the reverse yarn over was moving before the stitch it should have been after.  I know it has something to do with the way I knit and I though "this is really inconvenient and I need to just do it 'this way'" and fixed how I was doing the reverse yarn over to a regular yarn over and then twisted it around when I stitched it on the next row.

I should have read the pattern notes because that's exactly what Cookie A suggested we do...if the reverse was causing problems, then just twist it when you get to it.

And you know what happened then?  EVERYTHING fell into place with this pattern.  It was at this point I realized there was an 8 stitch repeat that I could separate with markers on my needles and that the yarnovers moved in a logical pattern that helped me remember how to do the pattern.  Twisting was part of the nature of it and I FLEW!  Simply flew.

It actually reminded me of learning to play Mozart.  Mozart wrote sonatas with rules...there are lots of scales, arpeggios and key changes, but there are rules and expectations to all of those and once you know what they are learning to play and playing them well are just a matter of practice and time.

And that's when I realized that Cookie A is a genius.  I think she spits out sock patterns like Mozart spat out sonatas!  Just think it and there they are!  And the beauty of her work is that while it is difficult, it's accessible and you learn something every single time you work on one of her patterns. (kinda like playing Mozart, huh?).  As I worked through this pattern it became so much easier and so much more fun and so beautiful.  I think this pic is about when I realized how much of a genius Cookie A is...I'm past the heel turn and well into the foot by now.

Yarn is Dragon Sock by Dragonfly Fibers in colorway "Tree of Life" (June Club color).  The pattern is Drogon which is one of the Cookie A April club patterns.

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Daddy's Story:  Daddy could talk like Donald Duck...and he would also make this noise that would make cats jump to the ceiling.  I particularly loved it when he did it around Oliver (or sweet, dumb orange beauty) because he would just keep walking like nothing happened and it was SO funny).

Crafting ADHD: Crisis Point?

I think I may have hit a new crisis point in my crafting ADHD...I have zero stick-to-it-tive-ness and I just don't know what to do about it.  And really I don't think I should do anything about it but then there's a niggling little part of my brain that thinks I should.

Should I shut it up?  Or should I just proceed with the way things are going and deal?

Here's the issue:  I'm not finishing anything.  Anything at all.  I'm enjoying myself.  I'm having a crazy amount of fun with my granny squares (I think I made 5 yesterday)...I'm totally enjoying my needlepoint (I even started a new one this week, abandoning the old one because it's so large and bulky and uncomfortable to work on...and I have no idea why I bought it to begin with).  I'm actually starting to think about knitting again (I know it's only been about a month, but it's been a rough month and I was worried that the psychological stress of losing my dad might take knitting away from me like Katrina took quilting away from me).

However, I'm interested in working with my club yarn--one of which came in yesterday and is so pretty and I think it'll be perfect to use to knit one pair of the Cookie A socks from April (you know, the stuff I got before the world came crashing down and I had no focus).  So there's another project that wants to get started...and I'm not sure I have enough needles to start it!

I had the thought yesterday that I just need to knit socks all the time and crochet afghans and maybe that'll take some of the stash down to size...I'm not sure what I'd do with all these socks and afghans.  David said he imagines a cartoon with me sitting underneath a mountain of socks and a Pearl hiding in there.  I can see that too...

And on some level I know that's ok.  I know it's ok to just do what makes me happy and not worry about finishing things.  I'll go on a finishing spree eventually...I always do...but in the meantime I'm starting to feel a tad stressed about it and I need to let that go.

Because really:

• there are no deadlines
• I'm doing this for fun and a creative outlet
• no one is getting hurt
• I've had an awful lot going on my plate lately and I don't need to do ANYthing that adds to the stress
• THERE ARE NO DEADLINES.

There I feel better.

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This morning while I was drinking my coffee, Zora was sitting at my feet having a bath.  She's a very thorough bather.

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Daddy's story:  My daddy was a big player of solitaire.  He would lay in the floor each night watching tv and play game after game of solitaire.  I think shuffling the cards was almost as much fun for him as playing the game.  When I was little I watched him, learned the rules and started hanging out with him playing solitaire.  We would occasionally play double solitaire, but I'd always lose and that's not fun when you're a kid.  Anyway, one day I was playing solitaire with a friend (I was probably 9 or so) and pulled a card from one of the upside down stacks to help me along and she said, "what are you doing? that's cheating."  I said, "that's how my daddy plays and he never cheats."  Later I told my mom about it and she just laughed and laughed.

Yeah...Daddy cheated.  Big time.  He never ever lost a game of solitaire in his life, something that I was terrifically impressed with, even after I figure out why!

More and more grannies

Definitely obsessed.  I could hardly wait to get home from dinner with our friends last night to get back to work on my grannies...and then I stayed up until almost 11, which is way past my normal bedtime these days.  And when I woke up at 4 to go to the bathroom, I almost considered going ahead and getting up because I'd have all that extra granny time, but remembered that I have to drive to work AND sit here all day (and they kind of like me awake at work) so I went back to sleep and held myself off.

I'm working from Leisure Arts book 99 Granny Squares to Crochet.  If I love a pattern I'll make several until I'm bored and then put a heart next to it so I can come back to it later.  If I like one, I'll put a check by it.  If I didn't like it at all for whatever reason, I'll put an X by it.  I'm on square 7 today :)

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This morning when I went in to make sure all cats were out of my bedroom, I found this.

 I think sweet Pearl wants to make sure I don't leave her again.

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Daddy's Story:  Despite the fact that Daddy couldn't sing well, he did sing all the time.  I really think he loved listening to music, and the music got in his head because you could say something funny and he would pop out a few lines from a song.  The tone didn't always make sense but the rhythm did.  Two songs I remember him singing were "Trailers for sale or rent/ rooms to let...50 cents" and "Don't nobody love me but my mama" (Original BB lyrics are "mother" not "mama"...but he had that "not my mama" phrase down perfect.  The funny thing is I didn't know that the BB song was actually a song until I heard it traveling out to visit last year when we bought our BB Greatest Hits.  The cut on that album is a live version and the quality isn't great.  As David and I were talking, I heard "but my mother."  And I said, WAIT!  Then rewinded the song and listened to it.  How incredibly funny it was to me that day to realize that Daddy listened to the blues!

Granny Squares

I love the homey feel of the name "Granny Square"...and I LOVE that you can pretty much not mess up on a granny square.  As long as you're consistent and keep making the appropriate increases, pretty much anything goes.

And in my new-found interest (love, passion, obsession?) with crochet, I've gone a little wacky making granny squares.

David calls it my gypsy blanket because I'm using up my random bits of sock yarn in addition to the mini skeins I've sort of become obsessed with (can one be sort of obsessed?) and just letting the yarn run out, tying on the new color and starting...so the rounds are getting muddled and I really like the effect.

This is one of the squares I finished yesterday.

From the center:  Spring Hill cashmere sock (she's quit dying yarn which made me extremely sad), Lorna's Laces DK weight in color ? and Lorna's Laces Solemate in color ?  And I RAN OUT of the outside color just as I was tying off...which doesn't happen often...

Anyway, it's been fun working on these and I'll continue to do so as long as I'm interested.  I do find that I LOVE crocheting with sock-weight yarn....just like I love knitting with it.

And speaking of...I haven't worked on a sock in over a month. I'm feeling the pull again, which is nice.

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Daddy's Story:  Daddy wore these "green jeans" around the house most of my life.  They were some awful polyester stretchy kind of pants that were apparently the most comfortable things he ever owned...and they grew and shrunk with him magically as he gained and lost weight.  I know I saw him in them for the better part of 20 years.  They got "lost" in the move when he and mom moved out of the farm-house and into town. I don't think he ever had the love of the knit sweat pants or pajama pants that mom bought for him to replace those green jeans.

What's done is done...

Well, the girls are moved away and happily settling into their new home in Florida.  We had awful, and I mean awful, weather going out, but Friday morning dawned crisp and beautiful and we unpacked the Uhaul in just a couple of hours and got to the point of settling everything else in--buying a bed for Liz, food and general needs supplies for both, unpacking, helping cats adjust.

(A bit of advice for those of you about to move.  When you pack a box and label it...something more specific that "stuff" or "misc" would be helpful in sorting out where boxes initially go...but we prevailed and unpacked a good bit before the end of the day on Friday.)

The amazing:

• There's a Publix not 5 minutes from their apartment
• They are about 10 minutes from most of the parks (we were 15 minutes from our hotel room in the resort to their apartment parking lot)
• They are working in Epcot (Future World attractions yea!)
• They are hanging things on the walls and settling in in these few days before they start work-proper

They are also only a short drive from Carrabas where we had these in accompaniment to our farewell dinner Saturday night:

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On Saturday we went to Animal Kingdom where we got an up-close-and-personal view of a hippo in the water.  Look closely, you'll see him.

We also rode the train up to Rafiki's station where we got to pet some goats.  Elizabeth wouldn't let us take her picture, so it looks like it's just me, David and Alyssa at AK:

And finally, David and I went to the bar at our resort where we drank martinis in honor of our daughters' move and were very proud parents, indeed:

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I got almost no crafting done on this trip.  I think I completed two crocheted dish cloths.  I just didn't have the time or inclination to do so (and riding out there in the Uhaul was simply too bumpy to do anything).  On the way home I was just so tired and overwhelmed that I pretty much just sat there until we were home.

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Daddy's story:  I remember one Christmas part at church for Daddy's Sunday School class, and I was put in his group along with Kenneth Allen.  We were to draw to find out what day we were in the 12 days of Christmas song...we got "a patridge in a pear tree."  Daddy can't sing...at all as I mentioned earlier...neither could Kenneth.  And I was just a wee kid, old enough to be embarrassed, but not old enough to carry the group.  It was so awful, but whoever was in charge of this activity had no pity or mercy and plugged on through 12 horrible days of Christmas...I think everyone in the room was laughing so hard by the end that no one could sing their part...Poor daddy.  I'm pretty sure he was mortified!

Major Life Events

I've been going through some pretty serious major life events lately.  Normally, with each one I would be excited (well the good ones, anyway), and dive in and appreciate it all to the fullest...but seriously...it's been a lot to put together in my mind all at once.

This weekend, Elizabeth graduated college.  Both of my girls are now college graduates and should be working on their master's degrees next semester (Alyssa started hers this semester).  Meanwhile in TWO days we are moving them to Orlando to begin the next awesome phase of their lives.

And it IS exciting, but what am I doing to cope?  Crocheting and Needlepointing until my hands and fingers and back and neck hurt!  It's like I get excited thinking about it and have to take that energy and make something with it.

So far I've crocheted a lot of bath cloths.  I LOVE using these little cloths instead of the store-bought kind.  So much cushionier and softer and better in so many ways.  Plus the bath cloths are an awesome opportunity to see how the yarn likes a certain stitch (or how I like a certain stitch) and whether I think it'll blow up well.  If I think it'll look good on a larger scale I'm making it as part of the bath mats I'm making for the girls' new apartment.  So far, I'm on the border of Elizabeth's first one and have ideas ruminating for Alyssa's first one, which I'll start once the border on Liz's is done...patience I tell my creative self...patience.

Highlights of the weekend:

Elizabeth in her finery with the rest of us hangers on:

Painting with a Twist as a family group:

And while not a highlight of the weekend, it was fun watching Pearl help me pay the bills:

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Daddy's Story:  I remember my daddy waking me up every single morning.  Now, I feel sorry for him that he had that duty...I have always been difficult to get moving in the morning and am cranky about it to boot.  I know that after a while Daddy decided it was safest to just turn on the light in my room and make noise, but that didn't work very well.  In his typical good humored way he would open the door, turn on the lights and start singing to me (he couldn't sing.  At. all...it was miserable).  He would sing, "Get out of that bed and wash your face and hands...toodaloodleloodaloo"  The tooda...was accompanied by turning the light switch on and off and on and off in "time" to the singing.

When I got my first iPhone, I looked for the appropriate sounding alarm to wake myself up to...that sounded similar enough to the tooda...I chose the "Trill" and titled the alarm "get out of that bed."  I wake up laughing about that now (still not easy to get out of bed) but at least I can see the humor in it all...when I was 16 not so much.

Little "gifts"

So, my husband came home from his most recent trip with a little cold which he has now given to me...just in time for my mom and her aunt to come visit for Elizabeth's graduation.  He promises I'll feel better in 3 days...hmmm...

I didn't crochet much last night.  I still haven't tidied my house for our company.  The picture for today is a kitty cat picture because Pearl just makes me laugh so much and I need a good laugh.

She was "getting" me through the slats in our rocking chair.  She's just a nut...that's all.

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Daddy's story:  When I graduated from high school my dad said I was going around saying "Free at last, free at last!  Thank God Almighty I'm free at last!"  (and I was, but I didn't want he and mom to KNOW that).

Anyway, anytime else that we moved on to a new thing in life he would say "Free at last, free at last!"

I know he's singing it for Elizabeth this weekend.

How'd you do that?

So, last night I crocheted this little bath cloth:

I think it's really cute and David likes that it puckers up a little and provides a good grip for a bath cloth.  We'll see if it is big enough when it's washed and dried...it looks a tad small to me, but these things do grow.

Anyway, I sent the pic to mom and she said, "how'd you do that?"  I told her I read the pattern and then made it up (what I got out of the pattern is that I was supposed to chain 5, create a ring, single crochet in the ring and then chain 7 off of the ring).  From there it was crocheting in the pink to create the body of the cloth...decreasing at the base and increasing at the tips of the flowers.  It really wasn't hard and I totally made it up once I did the first round.

And if I can figure out how to make it lay flatter then I'll definitely be blowing up this idea into a bath rug because that would be the cutest cutest thing in the world. (or placemats...)

Anyway, all of this is to say that crochet somehow makes intuitive sense to me.  I "learned" by watching Knit and Crochet Now! and Knitting Daily TV...so the process of the steps had been shown to me over and over (and yes, I watch them over and over and over)...but the act of creating items from crochet...it makes perfect sense.  Once I figured out where to start my first stitch on a row, I was cruising!

I'm testing different stitch patterns out on bath cloths...I'll have a bunch by the time this is over...and what I like I'm making into stripes for the girls' bath mats...Liz's now has two, and I think I'm going to alternate these two patterns with the different colors to create a really run and very textured bath mat.  What I love about doing these mats in the single strand of cotton is that they can be thrown directly into the washing machine easily...we will see how they hold up, but I think they'll be good.

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Daddy's story:  When I was younger my daddy had a "big old belly" and I used to tease him that he had a baby in that belly.  I would watch tv with him and prop my head on his belly while we watched.  That baby would "kick" and knock my head around and I would laugh and laugh.

Past Tense

I remember when I got the call that Daddy passed away, I thought "We have to refer to him in past tense now."  I know...weird English major...but that's me.  I think in terms of language, grammar and putting sentences together.

And I remember thinking "I don't know how to do that."

I am finding that it is extremely difficult to do.  It should be just a simple parsing of a verb.  Taking it from its infinitive form--to be--to past tense--was/were/been--...but man...that is so profound.

And I don't like it...at all...not one tiny little bit.

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What I'm noticing, and this is really interesting, is that I'm making the mistake and saying things like "Daddy tells this really funny story."  Or, as was the case on Friday last week at my student worker end-of-term party, "Daddy LOVES NutterButter cookies."  I had a whole roomful of pity filled eyes look at me when I made that grammatical error.  And it was really hard to see and kind of choked me up for a minute and I almost couldn't go on with the funny story about my daddy and the NutterButter cookies (I'll tell you below).

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So, right now, I don't like past tense and I'm convinced it's why I have 30 works in progress and about 10 more in my head that I want to work on...Crochet continues to be pretty intense.  I subscribed to 3 crochet magazines yesterday, am planning an entire house decorated with crochet items...the possibilities! (future tense...that feels so much better).

Today's picture is of the mutilated yarn on its second warp.  This one is brown cotton and the weaving pattern is called "Cat's Paws."

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Daddy's Story:  Daddy loved Nutter Butter cookies when I was growing up.  Mom would go to the grocery store on Saturdays and buy him a package of them and he would open them up as soon as we got home.  They would sit on the counter and he would grab one or two, or a handful, as he walked through the kitchen on his way to various places (on Saturday or Sunday afternoons in the fall that would often be from in front of the TV watching football to the bathroom and back again).  He could plow through an entire package of cookies in the weekend.

Shortly after my father turned 50, he was diagnosed with Type II diabetes, so mom quit buying the Nutter Butters and anything else sweet that would tempt him.  And then one day mom was buying peaches from the road-side stand, stepped off the curb and broke both of her ankles at the same time.  My dad was then put in charge of going to the grocery store.  He came home from that first trip so excited because "did you know they started making Nutter Butters again"...there were 2 packages in the bags...one for that day and one for the rest of the week.

Perspective

I talk a lot about perspective on the blog...perhaps I need to put a label over there and put them all together and maybe write a book about perspective one day.  It's one of those topics that I think has lots and lots of ways of looking at it (ha!).

One of the reasons (I remembered this once I got back at it) that I love working needlepoint and cross stitch projects is because I can have such a close view of different pieces of the project.  Then when you get to step back and see the whole thing...wow.  I remember as a kid working these particularly sweet projects by Precious Moments and loving the eyes, the mouths and the general faces of the projects.  I worked on a "strawberry girl" for Elizabeth a long time ago and I remember being very fascinated with the gingham print of the dress (especially as it was 4 colors and I loved how they interacted and how the "folds" of the dress were displayed as an interruption in the pattern.  How interesting.

The really cool thing about working a projects, any project actually, is that as you focus on the tiny details, the big picture sometimes gets lost...and it's like a big "reveal" when you're done and you get to see the whole thing.  It's also awesome because as someone who crafts, you can look at other people's work, notice the big picture first, and then dig into the details.  While you may not see the details in quite the same way they did, you get to see them nonetheless.

And I'm always amazed that I "made" whatever it is that I'm looking at.  I always think "I never saw it that way" until I see it that way.  It's pretty awesome, that.  I love it that my work becomes better when it gets out of my hands and into the hands of others, or on a bed, or on a wall...

Life is like that, too, don't you think?  Big picture things are often really really hard to come by.  We get bogged down in the daily-ness of life and forget to look at the big things, the overarching themes, the general-ness that's going on around us.  And just like in crafting, every now and then we get the big a-ha moment and say "wow"...that's pretty awesome.

I've hit some big turning points in my life lately--with my father's passing, and the upcoming move of my daughters not to mention the whole work situation--And what's getting me through it is that knowing life, like in crafting, has perspective and while things may seem difficult in the details right now, the big picture will be awesome when I have a chance to step back and look at it...just must find that vantage point and the time to slow down and appreciate it.

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I think I need to go to Switzerland, don't you?

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Daddy's story:  When I was little I would ride around with my daddy whenever I could.  I love snuggling up next to him in the cab of the truck (this was before the days of required car seats for tots and seat belts for everyone else).  I would sing songs from the radio and tell him stories and we would have a grand old time.  When we were driving through town my daddy would invariable ask if I wanted to "drive by Dairy Queen" and I would get so excited and say "yes yes, let's drive by Dairy Queen"...I was going to get a Dilly Bar or a dipped cone and I could taste it and could even feel my tummy start to get hungry...then we would do just that...drive right on by.  Not stopping, not turning in, not going to...not going through the drive through...just driving by.  OH how it got me every.single.time.

Everything I Should Have Said

I don't know when I've reviewed an album on my blog...I know I haven't done it on this one, trying very hard to be focused on my crafting and all...I may have reviewed one or two on Peek, but that would have been years ago and my memory doesn't seem to be too good these days.

But I'm going to review an album today, throw in some pics of what I crocheted while listening to that album over and over and tell you a quick related story about my daddy.  How's that for a teaser.

Album:  Everything I Should Have Said by Radney Foster.

Amazing.  Simply 100% amazing.  I listened to it the first time through and kept sending David texts "yep, like this song." "love this one."  "oooh, look this one up."  Every single song on the album blew me away.  That happens so very rarely on an album...so of course, I listened to it again--4 times last night, once again this morning while getting ready.  I suspect I'll be listening to it a few times over the weekend as well.  It truly is wonderful.  Go to his web-site and buy everything you don't have by RF...he's a genius song-writer and has such a lovely voice.  His sense of humor and "lived-in" life feels true to me. I relate to his work as an artist (which I fancy myself from time to time), as a spouse, as a parent, as a person trying to see things get better in the world, as someone who questions what human beings are thinking when they do certain things...as someone who has screwed up royally and regretted it...and definitely as someone who has loved deeply and knows that's the most important thing.  Simply the most important thing ever.

My favorite song on the album (well, there are two) is the first one called "Whose Heart you Wreck (Ode to the Muse)"...and man is it awesome.  Lyrics here.  [my muse comes in just as I'm falling asleep at night, btw.  I'm desperate to trap her at some point in the day when it's more convenient, but isn't that the point of the song?]

My other favorite song on the album is "Unh Unh Unh"...what a playful wonderful love song.  Reminds me of  other Radney Foster songs, but with an up-tempo beat that you can't resist.

Unfortunately I don't have the album on my iPod, so won't be able to listen to it at work, but I am listening to all the Radney Foster songs in my playlist...can't wait to get this one on my iPod and memorize all the songs on it.

Love love love!

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Crochet:  I'm already designing in my head, tweaking patterns, and rethinking things.  I worked on one last night, pictured below that wasn't coming out right and I knew it but couldn't figure out what was wrong (the pattern, come to find out).

Isn't it a pretty little hexagon--row 3 finished and problem identified and new pattern executed.

 Hexagon finished.  A little "airier" than I want for a bath cloth but we'll try it out and see how it works.

First bath cloth finished.  Everyone says it looks like a candy necklace.

And finally, because I couldn't stop listening to Radney or put my crochet hook down, I started a purple granny square.  I worked on this some more this morning and I have to admit I'm really enjoying it...wondering if the finished result will be close to the same size as the three squares I've done previously...I'm seeing a totally random kind of blanket there...

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Daddy's Story:
My daddy was always one to talk to himself.  Not in the "I'm working on something and trying to concentrate" kind of way, but in the general having a conversation with himself. I do this too, so don't find anything strange about it (though I have learned that most people don't talk to themselves and I find this sad for them).  Most of the time I do it in my head (now) but as a child or when I'm alone, I'll talk out loud. I'm sure Daddy was the same way because I don't remembering hearing him talk to himself much when I got older.  However,  once when I asked my daddy who he was talking to he said, "Myself."  Then he paused and replied "It's the best conversation I've ever had!"

Exactly.

More thoughts on crochet

So, yesterday I spent most of the day toying around with my new skills...crochet skills that is.  I also went shopping and had lunch with a friend, so I did get out a bit too.

My thoughts on crochet:

• it's way faster than knitting
• you can make really cool flowers with crochet if you know what you're doing
• sometimes the end product looks a little funny, so knitting is definitely better (for things like socks for instance)
• sometimes crochet is better suited to a project than knitting.

Here is my progress to support the points (all but #2...haven't attempted flowers yet):

 This will become a bath cloth.  It's knit in simple single and double crochet along a row.  This skill was actually kind of difficult for me at first.  I kept getting more or fewer stitches per row, but I think I've finally figured it out.

Three granny squares completed in an evening and a half.  This is going to be a totally random kind of granny square blanket.  We shall see what we think of it when we're done.

And finally, a skein of yarn crocheted into a boa-type scarf...in an hour or so.  SO much easier than knitting...I gave up on it after trying to knit it because it was majorly slow and fussy and frustrating.  Put a crochet hook through those loops and loop back on the chain every now and again and you have a fun little scarf!  I have two more skeins to work on when I feel like it (I will admit that it was still kind of fiddly but SO much better than knitting).

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Daddy's Story:

When I was growing up my daddy called me Lester Suskanewski.  I hated it but he did it anyway.

Crochet

Today's post may shock you...don't read if stories about little kids being told they can't do something makes you angry, mad, sad, etc., and that's not an emotion you can handle.

When I was younger my mom crocheted.  She made these awesome footies with all these loops sticking out all over.  We each got a pair for Christmas.  My grandfather Thornton was all arave about them and actually got two pairs because he wore them out.  she would crochet them holding two strands of yarn together so we got fun colors in there too.

Us kids LOVED them the best because when you took off running you could skid all the way across the kitchen and it was amazing fun.  We had holes in our footies by spring but that was ok because we'd just throw on a pair of socks under them and keep wearing them.

My mom's mom was also a big crocheter.  She made all the grandbabies and great grandbabies (until mine were born) layette sets of amazing beauty and complexity.  She worked with tiny tiny threads and made doilies and Christmas ornaments.

And with two such important women crocheting around me, I was bound to pick up a hook and give it a try...so I did.  And I made bunches of granny squares (I still wonder what happened to them).  One day when I was at Grandma M's house I showed her my crochet and told her that I was going to be just like her when I grew up and she looked at my granny square and told me it was terrible. That she'd never seen anything so poorly done.  She pointed out where I'd messed up and showed me how I'd left some loop open and that it would unravel eventually.

She said I was a "hopeless crocheter" and would never be as good as she was.

I don't remember feeling sad or crying or anything.  I just remember looking at the granny square that I was so proud of 5 minutes earlier and seeing all the errors she pointed out.  It was wonky, mismatched and there were loops hanging out.  I didn't ask for help from her to fix it...she was so beyond me and she'd already shown me that I was terrible.

So I put down my crochet hook and never picked it up again.

Until yesterday.  And yesterday I made a very wonky looking washcltoh and this start to a granny square.  I'm hooked :)

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Daddy's story:  Well, this one is a bit about me, but it does show how funny he was.  At the funeral the preacher described my dad as the simplest of simple men.  And he really was.  He loved his few things and the rest he didn't bother with.  He wore blue jeans and t-shirts almost every day, had a routine, and was simply a genuine person.  He was therefore, the most difficult person in the world to buy gifts for.  As a teenager, I  saved my money for several months to get Christmas gifts for people and came upon the best one for Daddy.  It was an indoor/outdoor thermometer with barometer and a few other weather gadgets on it.  It was in a really pretty wooden case and had brass fittings on it.  Quite fancy.  (Daddy was also a major weather lover).

On that Christmas Daddy opened the box, looked at it, exclaimed over how neat it was and then put it next to the back door where he was going to put it up.  And it stayed there for a year.  At Christmas the next year I told mom I just didn't know what to get him and was tempted to get him the thermometer thing I'd gotten him the year before.  She said, "do it."  So I did.

Daddy's face upon opening his present a second time was priceless!

The indoor/outdoor thermometer was hanging up by the end of Christmas day!

When life give you lemons...

...or when a cat destroys your yarn....

Make scarves!

I have the first of 2 scarves finished from the salvaged kitty terror incident.  I'll have finished pics to show later this week, but I did want to tease you with the first one on the loom:

I'm not sure why the pic is turned sideways, but anyway, the warp is actually running right to left...I used a silver and pale green tencel (two strands, one of each color) for the warp and the Cephalopod yarn is the weft.  The pattern is a simple twill and was a perfect first project for getting back on the loom.  I completely finished this project yesterday, minus the fringe twisting.  I think I'll have a fringe twisting "party" later this week as I have another scarf in there that needs fringe twisted, the one I'll make today, and then I need to get Liz's birthday scarf finished (yes, that's from her January 2nd birthday).

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Daddy's story:  My daddy would always say to me, "how much do you love me?"  We had this little routine where I would respond "this much" and hold my fingers a tiny bit apart.  He would pout and pretend to cry and say "Is that all...say you love me more."  And I would then hold my hands about a foot apart and say, "I love you this much daddy." At this point he would "tune up and cry" and say "How much do you love me?" and I would throw my arms wide and say "I love you this much Daddy" and I'd run and give him a big-old-hug.

One time I threw him for a loop, though.  He asked me how much I loved him and I held up my right hand and said, "I love you this much."  He looked puzzled and said..."what does that mean."  I looked at him and pointed at my right hand and said, "my love starts here and goes on and on and on...my arms aren't big enough to show you!"    I got an extra big hug for that one.  I was probably 4 or 5 at the time. (and think I was pretty precocious, to be honest!)

Carrying on

My father passed away on Tuesday of last week; we buried him on Thursday.  It's been a very difficult week...one that as I think back on it feels more like a month.  But it was only a week...and a very difficult one at that, as I said.

At the memorial service on Thursday people offered condolences and I remember saying "I don't know how we'll carry on without Daddy."  It's still difficult to understand, but I know we will because other people have.  It'll be hard, but it'll happen.

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And in the spirit of carrying on, I had to "rescue" a skein of yarn last night.  The kitties don't always have full access to my studio.  They like to sleep in the baskets of yarn and I don't like knitting with kitty hair flying in my face.

But yesterday, the level of activity with the yarn went to a different character...it became mean.  One of the little furry critters went in there and mutilated a brand new skein of my Cephalopod yarn:

If you're counting, that's 29 separate balls of yarn I wound off this morning.  29!  Whichever one it was (I suspect Zora because Pearl's level of play is less destructive, but I could be wrong) decided to kill this skein of yarn and did a pretty good job at it.

I'm going to make a scarf out of it.  There are still too many weak spots in the longer strands of yarn to use the yarn as warp, so it'll be weft yarn only with a lovely maroon cotton for the warp.  Or maybe green.  Haven't decided yet.

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Daddy's Story:  One of the things my daddy always did was take some silly thing we said as children and tell it back to us over and over and over again.  When I was younger he told me about being found under the telephone pole and that I was naked in that princess telephone box.  I told him "uh-uh...I was born with a diaper on."  And for the rest of his life, he told me that I was born with a diaper on...unlike every other kid in the world!