What a difference 20 years makes

20 odd years ago I went to Dillards in search of new jeans.  My old ones had gotten too tight.  I needed the new pair of jeans fairly soon, so losing weight to get into the ones I owned that were too tight wasn't an option.  So, off to the store I went to deal with the fact.  I searched and searched and searched and every pair of jeans I tried on was too tight.

The clerk realized what was happening to me and steered me to the plus-sized section of the store, where I did find a new pair of jeans that fit.  They were 16W and I was devastated.  I hated those pair of jeans.  Hated them.  Hated them in a way I'd never hated an inanimate object before.  They symbolized to me a failure on my part to get my life under control and to lose weight (or manage it!).  I did not think I looked good in these jeans, and I remember obsessing over the fact that the ankles were so wide.  This was long before the days of the wide-legged jeans (or after depending on how you're looking at it.)

But I wore those jeans because I didn't have much choice, but I do remember going home and crying because I was now "plus sized" and I would have to wear frumpy ugly clothes.  (I did later discover more fashionable options, btw).

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I didn't realize what a comfort I'd found in shopping in the plus-sized sections of the store until this Friday.  I have lost enough weight that it's time to get some new pants.  I was in 20W and figured that I'd probably be in 16W, so I picked out some pants and dresses and went to try them on.

The first pair of jeans I put on were 16W and they fit perfectly.  I almost cried with happiness.  I was immediately brought back to that first pair of 16W jeans I'd had to buy and how unhappy I was about them and how excited I was about these.

My what a difference 20 years makes!

I decided that I would go to the regular sized section of the store and try on the largest size they had there and see what would fit.  After all, these 16W jeans will start being big in a couple of weeks...I need to buy something that's a little snug now so that it'll be able to last me a few weeks on the "big side" as well.

Nothing "over there" fit in the pants yet.  Dresses, if they have a full skirt, were perfect, and I got a couple, but pants...not yet.  I am blessed with an ample bottom and will have to wait for another 15 or so pounds to drop before I'll make it to the regular sized pants.

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What I did find interesting was how overwhelming it was shopping in the regular sized section.  There are so many options, different designers, different collections.  There are cuts that are made for certain body types...and I was completely overwhelmed.  I tried on samples (things on sale!) from one section of Dillards only to find that there were at least 3 more as large if not larger sections yet to be discovered.  Definitely something for future shopping excursions.

I'm not sure my budget will be able to afford the skinny me :)

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Today's photo is of the 4th block in the Noro Afghan, what I'm calling "falling leaves."