Last night my getting out there friend came over for dinner and games.
We played lots of games...dominoes (5 point and chicken foot), Blockus, some card game with words that I can't remember...we talked and showed each other pictures of our travels and family. We discussed places we should go on a Sunday.
The cats loved him. Even Zora, who came begging for attention on multiple occasions and only slapped him once and that was provoked...he pushed his luck just a little... (I honestly don't think he "gets it" how special that is! Zora, not immediately hating on somebody...ha!)
Oh, and we watched the beautiful sunset from my balcony...it's really nice watching the sunset with another person.
And my brain is so full of all of this. In the interest of chronicling finding the beauty and recovering from a really awful situation and learning to take care of myself...I want to talk about this...this faith in the higher power...this letting go of the need to control.
When I left for my trip I said that I knew this was going to be a journey TO myself. I would find something while I was there that I didn't know existed about myself. I found my beauty on that trip. I found an ability to be comfortable around people and let down my prickly defenses so that others, strangers, could affirm my beauty and interact with me as well.
When I arrived in Zurich and got to my hotel room and was so very very tired, I rested for a bit before going to walk around my neighborhood and to the overlook of the city. I talked to my HP a bit and told him that I thought I was ready to interact with men on a deeper relationship level, but that I needed to do so safely. That it was time for me to start looking for those nice guys that were out there...that I'd really appreciate some help in that direction.
SO...at the airport waiting area the next day the MOST BEAUTIFUL man I'd ever seen sat down across from me and I gawked at him because how could I not. He made eye contact with me and smiled and I smiled back and thought "Ok..HP...let him sit next to me please"...and guess what. When I got on the plane he was across the aisle from me. Helped me with my bags, talked to me some, slept some, flirted some, helped me with my bags some more and then we got to the states and he went on the rest of his journey and I went on the rest of mine. I didn't even get his name.
And I realized that beautiful Swiss man was put there to ease my mind about all of this. HP has my back. HP will provide for me what I need when I need it...just the THING that I need and nothing more.
So, as I get back out there and the first date I have is with a super nice guy who totally respects my boundaries, let me set the pace, is polite, smart, funny and plays a mean game of whatever game we're playing...(oh and he doesn't mind (too much) losing.)...well...HP...you're the bomb!